I'm 16, I'm not old. Right?
That's what I used to think until a couple of months ago a thought started to sward in my head, slowly, getting deeper every time.
This thought is About something I'm sure most people have asked their selves too.
What have I done during all this time I've been living?
Is it too little?
Is it all I can and could have done?
Is it enough for me to think my life made sense?
When I look back and see younger people succeed this thought gets stronger. It's like I've been doing nothing while other were imagining, creating, moving, understanding. I don't mean by this that I feel envy or underestimate what I do, and try to do. I ask my self if am I doing something I will and do good. Or I am wasting my time and realising I threw away days , months and precious years of this short life I stared.
Should I keep doing what I believe is right? Many did and now they are immortal or at least heard. And many other...well I don't know what happened to those "others", is that choosing the wrong way?
I'm not sure if trying will assure me anything, and need to find the cure so I can eliminate the thought that boders me telling me I'm about to be and adult and what I leave along my childhood is a small but very important part of my life inverted in something else then following my dreams and needs. I hate thinking I wasted time because I cant go back in time.
Once again art is my comfort, and painters even some are gone, are the people in witch I reflect my self and thoughts into.
Throughout history, many artists we never given a chance to succeed or discovered late their talent or passion. And If you feel like sometime I have felt I invite you to read : I'M NOT OLD FOR ANYTHING IF I REMEMBER THAT... (coming soon)
Please, my intention is not to compare anybody with anyone, but to motivate my own self and who ever reads this to never stop doing anything because they think "it's late" or because somebody; doesn't matter if older or younger, does something you always wanted to.
Feels good to get it out.